Here are a few of my favorite quotes from the movie with a few scenes to help tie it together for those of you who have never seen the movie...which I recommend!
Ultrasound Technician: Well, there you have it. Would you like to know the sex? Leah: Yes! Juno MacGuff: No! Leah: Pleease, Juno, please! Juno MacGuff: No, there will be no sex! Ultrasound Technician: Planning to be surprised when you deliver? Juno MacGuff: Well, no, but I want Mark and Vanessa to be surprised and if you tell me I'll just, like, ruin everything. Ultrasound Technician: Are Mark and Vanessa your friends at school? Juno MacGuff: No, no, no. They're the adoptive parents. Ultrasound Technician: Oh, well thank goodness for that! Bren: What's that supposed to mean? Ultrasound Technician: I just see a lot of teenage mothers come through here and it's obviously a poisonous environment to raise a baby in. Juno MacGuff: How do you know I'm so poisonous? What if these adoptive parents turn out to be, like, evil molesters? Leah: Or, like, stage parents. Bren: They could be utterly negligent. Maybe they'll do a far shittier job of raising a kid than my dumbass step-daughter would. Have you considered that? Ultrasound Technician: I guess not. Bren: What is your job title exactly? Ultrasound Technician: I'm an ultrasound technician, ma'am. Bren: Well, I'm a nail technician and I think we both ought to just stick to what we know. Ultrasound Technician: Excuse me? Bren: Oh, you think you're so special because you get to play Picture Pages up there? Well, my five year old daughter could do that and let me tell you, she's not the brightest bulb in the tanning bed. So why don't you go back to night school in Mantino and learn a real trade. Juno MacGuff: Bren! You's a dick! I love it!
Juno MacGuff: As far as boyfriends go, Paulie Bleeker is totally boss. He is the cheese to my macaroni. And, I know that people are supposed to fall in love before they reproduce, but... I guess normalcy isn't really our style. 
Rollo: So what's the prognosis, Fertile Myrtle? Minus or plus? Juno MacGuff: I don't know. It's not seasoned yet. [grabs products] Juno MacGuff: I'll take some of these. Nope... There it is. The little pink plus sign is so unholy. [shakes pregnancy tester] Rollo: That ain't no Etch-A-Sketch. This is one doodle that can't be un-did, Homeskillet.
Ultrasound Technician: Well, there you have it. Would you like to know the sex? Leah: Yes! Juno MacGuff: No! Leah: Pleease, Juno, please! Juno MacGuff: No, there will be no sex! Ultrasound Technician: Planning to be surprised when you deliver? Juno MacGuff: Well, no, but I want Mark and Vanessa to be surprised and if you tell me I'll just, like, ruin everything. Ultrasound Technician: Are Mark and Vanessa your friends at school? Juno MacGuff: No, no, no. They're the adoptive parents. Ultrasound Technician: Oh, well thank goodness for that! Bren: What's that supposed to mean? Ultrasound Technician: I just see a lot of teenage mothers come through here and it's obviously a poisonous environment to raise a baby in. Juno MacGuff: How do you know I'm so poisonous? What if these adoptive parents turn out to be, like, evil molesters? Leah: Or, like, stage parents. Bren: They could be utterly negligent. Maybe they'll do a far shittier job of raising a kid than my dumbass step-daughter would. Have you considered that? Ultrasound Technician: I guess not. Bren: What is your job title exactly? Ultrasound Technician: I'm an ultrasound technician, ma'am. Bren: Well, I'm a nail technician and I think we both ought to just stick to what we know. Ultrasound Technician: Excuse me? Bren: Oh, you think you're so special because you get to play Picture Pages up there? Well, my five year old daughter could do that and let me tell you, she's not the brightest bulb in the tanning bed. So why don't you go back to night school in Mantino and learn a real trade. Juno MacGuff: Bren! You's a dick! I love it!
Juno MacGuff: As far as boyfriends go, Paulie Bleeker is totally boss. He is the cheese to my macaroni. And, I know that people are supposed to fall in love before they reproduce, but... I guess normalcy isn't really our style.Rollo: So what's the prognosis, Fertile Myrtle? Minus or plus? Juno MacGuff: I don't know. It's not seasoned yet. [grabs products] Juno MacGuff: I'll take some of these. Nope... There it is. The little pink plus sign is so unholy. [shakes pregnancy tester] Rollo: That ain't no Etch-A-Sketch. This is one doodle that can't be un-did, Homeskillet.Hmmm...I think I'll go see if it is showing on the movie channel.....
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